attraction is a balloon, love is a rock

you can’t call me a writer no more
or a whore
i’m never even sure what i’m doing
or what love is cos i feel it so often
and it may be plausible
that i’m not able
to love anyone or maybe i was right to say
i loved only one ever and it’d never go my way
but i’d try more than most people you could count
and any attempt at love would never amount
to you, the one i’d loved before sex or purity gone
you are still clean as a waterfall to me, never alone
not with me
but i’m scared and hurt
and lonely
cos you’ll never be truthful enough to see
that this is universal, our souls share the same dream
and i dream of you each night
always in flight but caught in the darkness of a starless sky
cos you continue this lie
though your lips touched mine
like a meteor in flight you sparked a light
i thought i’d only feel in my youth
but it’d been so long without you
that i forgot about that funny squiggle in my heart
i feel when i think of your wet lips apart
against my own the moonlit shown
like a secret or a regret
please don’t fret
i’ll savor forever my hand on your back
late-night snack of
only everything i ever wanted, even more than to be a poet
or to know everything there could be—
i wanted to know just what was inside that mind of yours
i can’t count the score no more—
my heart sang to be renowned for my words
until i remembered what your love cured
in my old achy, greatly fragile naive soul
you don’t have to kiss me no more, no one has to know
but remember that until i’m old
and almost dead alone in my head cos i’d never love
another just like i love you, too great to queue
into my future everything
if you’ll kiss me and never say a thing\

i’ll just wander around like i do
sadly kissing strangers and thinking of you//

god-fucking-dammit i could kill myself
i love you so fucking much i’ll melt
into a supernova that cries for eternity in the 4th dimension
just as long as you never mention
the warmth your body gives mine from tension—
sweet tension
love’s vicious
against my pathetic wishes
you in me (the n^to the 1000th power: perniciousness)

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